I came home last night with green and blue hands. Because I am inept at Bingo and drag my hands all through the cards.  My grandma loves bingo, and I used to take her quite regularly when I lived in Lethbridge before, so I volunteered and the date was set.

Prior to bingo my grandma likes to make dinner and we make an entire evening of it. So I showed up at 4:50. Supper was well underway and in true grandma style it looked wholly unhealthy and flatulence inspiring. The protein was ham… fried in butter. The starch was hashbrowns from a bag… fried in butter. The vegetables were… decidedly absent. It took about 10 minutes to eat, and then we were off.

Grandma got in the prius and declared – “I could never drive a car like this.” Well as far as I know grandma never drove ANY car so I guess she shouldn’t really worry about driving mine. I told her not to sweat it, she didn’t have to drive this car because I was taking care of it. We got her buckled in, which is ALWAYS a challenge since she hates seatbelts and thinks they are stupid. She muttered under her breath the whole way there that it was stupid, and useless.

We arrived. Approximately one hour before bingo was to begin. This was reminiscent of the time I took my cousin to the circus. My grandma insisted we should leave really super early so we could get “good seats.” We sat in the venue for more than an hour, just me and him, totally alone, but in the best seats in the house. When will I learn my lesson.

Throughout the evening I was subjected to grandma’s thoughts on death – “when it’s your time, it’s your time.” Later on I was subjected to her thoughts on calling bingo – “when it’s your time, it’s your time.” Interesting. We didn’t win and didn’t win and there was complaining and grumbling about how bad the caller was. But then I won $200 and then there was muttering under the breath about how that wasn’t too bad for the rest of the evening. It was truly funny, she loves bingo, but I also think she loves to complain. It must have been a wonderful night for her to merge her two loves in life.

Honorable mention – stuffed animal man. There was this guy who kept winning stuffed animal after stuffed animal out of that claw machine. They were all set up around him on his table. So strange.



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